What to Do When the Other Parent Moves Out of State With Your Child
Discovering that the other parent has moved out of state with your child can feel heartbreaking and overwhelming. You might worry about your child's well-being, your relationship with them, and how you'll maintain meaningful contact.
These situations often bring fear, anger, and uncertainty, especially when the move happens suddenly or without your agreement. It's normal to feel a sense of loss and a sense of urgency to act.
At Talbert Divorce and Family Law LLC, led by attorney Will Talbert, we help parents facing these challenges. We serve clients in Kansas City, Missouri, and throughout Clay County and Jackson County. We also serve residents in Johnson County, Kansas. If you're dealing with this issue, reach out to us for guidance tailored to your circumstances.
Stay Calm and Document Everything
When you learn about the move, your first instinct might be to react emotionally, but taking a measured approach can protect your rights and your child's interests.
Start by gathering facts calmly. Contact the other parent to understand the reasons for the move and any plans for your ongoing involvement. Keep records of all communications, including texts, emails, and calls. Note dates, times, and what was said.
Documentation plays a key role if the situation ends up in court. It helps show your efforts to co-parent and any behavioral patterns. Some key steps to take right away to protect your rights and maintain involvement in your child's life:
Confirm the child's location: Ask directly for the new address and contact information.
Review your current custody order: Check what it says about relocation, notice requirements, and parenting time.
Avoid confrontational actions: Don't threaten or attempt to retrieve the child yourself without legal advice, as this could complicate matters.
By staying organized from the beginning, you build a stronger position. These early steps often make a big difference in resolving the issue favorably.
Determine If the Move Violates the Law
In Missouri and Kansas, parents can't simply relocate a child out of state without following specific rules, primarily if a custody order exists.
Missouri law, under Section 452.377 of the Revised Statutes, defines relocation as a change in the child's principal residence for 90 days or more. The relocating parent must provide written notice by certified mail at least 60 days in advance.
This notice should include the intended new address (or city if unknown), the planned move date, reasons for the move, and a proposed revised parenting plan. If you object within 30 days by filing a motion, the court must approve the move, focusing on the child's best interests.
In Kansas, statutes like K.S.A. 23-3222 require written notice at least 30 days before changing the child's residence or removing the child from the state for more than 90 days. The notice goes by restricted mail. Even in the absence of a custody order, sudden moves can still affect best-interest determinations. Common violations of relocation laws in Missouri and Kansas:
No prior notice: Moving without the required advance warning.
Ignoring objections: Proceeding despite your timely opposition.
Hiding the child: Concealing the new location or limiting contact.
Incomplete notice: Failing to include required details like reasons or a new plan.
A violation can lead to court orders requiring the child's return, contempt findings, or changes to custody. Acting quickly preserves your options.
Take Immediate Legal Action
If the move appears unauthorized or harms your relationship with your child, don't wait—seek legal remedies promptly. File a motion in the original court that issued your custody order to enforce it or prevent further issues. You may request an emergency order for the child's return or temporary custody.
Both Missouri and Kansas follow the Uniform Child Custody Jurisdiction and Enforcement Act (UCCJEA), which generally keeps jurisdiction with the state that issued the initial order, even after a move, unless significant time has passed or connections shift. Some options for urgent relief include:
Motion to enforce custody: Ask the court to order compliance with the existing plan.
Contempt filing: If the other parent willfully violated the order.
Emergency pickup order: In extreme cases, to facilitate the child's immediate return.
Courts prioritize the child's best interests, considering stability, parental bonds, and any safety concerns. We often help clients file these motions swiftly to minimize disruption. Working with an experienced family law attorney can make this process easier and move along more smoothly.
Consider Long-Term Solutions
Even if you secure the child's return or temporary arrangements, the underlying issues may require permanent changes.
You might seek a custody modification if the move or related circumstances show a significant change affecting the child's well-being. This could include adjusting parenting time, decision-making authority, or even primary residence. If the relocation seems permanent and in good faith, propose a new long-distance parenting plan with extended visits, virtual contact, and shared travel costs.
Mediation can sometimes resolve these disputes amicably, preserving co-parenting relationships. When needed, we advocate strongly in court for outcomes that protect your parental rights.
Seek Professional Guidance Today
Facing an out-of-state move with your child brings high emotions and high stakes. You don't have to handle it alone. Laws can vary slightly from state to state, and timing is critical—delays can limit your remedies.
At Talbert Divorce and Family Law LLC, we guide parents through these challenging times with compassion and determination. Based in Kansas City, Missouri, we serve clients throughout Clay County, Jackson County, Missouri, and Johnson County, Kansas.
Reach out to us today for a consultation. We'll review your situation, explain your rights under Missouri or Kansas law, and help you take the following steps to protect your family. Contact Will Talbert and our dedicated staff—we're here to support you.
